Ink Droplets, Keyboard Sounds & Life Updates

Andaran atish'an! (Enter this place in peace.) It has been ages since I have last updated this ruin of a blog, has it not? Well, I am here, once again and I will try to endure having to update this blog quite frequently. Yes, I have no limitations nor any obligations but I wish to go on.  After all, I spent so much time on the new customisation: Spring is here, have you noticed? I truly hope you enjoy the new theme! And now it would be best if I updated you about my studies I presume, so let's begin! 

 

Soon it will be the end of the second term already, phew time flies fast! I am honestly having such a difficult time at university while also endeavoring to increase my scholarship but the competition is though. I want the scholarship not only because of some economic difficulty but also for validating myself. To whom you might ask: Myself. Yes, in order to see my worth, to comprehend that I am not an utter failure, to trust in myself I need the approval of that scholarship. This sounds rather odd, I am very well aware of that but I truly do not wish for all my effort, blood, sweat and tears to go to waste. And oh I did deal with tons of stress I am telling you, stressing out about stressing out has been my favourite leisure time activity. Without further due, I wish to publish some of the works I did this year.

My face once again, the. mane has grown a bit longer yet it is such a slow and a painful process.

 

Those listed above are some works from the foundation studio of graphic design. Oh I have a lot to learn, my stress levels increasing at an alarming rate. What if I fail? What if I never get better? I have this constant worry devouring my mind since I am very well aware of the fact that I am such a slow learner. Adding up to this, I rarely have the motivation and energy to practise, therefore I feel utterly doomed. I know merely wishing will never be enough, but I truly truly hope that I can find a solution to this. Now passing onto some drawings...

 

Yes yes yes, I know I immediately need to start drawing more and more since there seems to be tons of errors. Despite all the flaws, I wished to share them with you since this post has a documentary quality of my education year. Now onto some more personal drawings... This time, all the sketches will focus on Maedhros, the most beloved fictional character of my heart. I love him because he is not perfect, yet he struggles to be a decent person. I am in awe of his strength and all the tragedy enfolding him. 

 

(Adjusting photo sizes and alignments is rather hard in Blogger, it is unreal aaargh!)

Last but not least, I have some self-portraits for you. I hope you enjoy them! The coloured one is not finşished yet, but seeing that I keep ruining it as time passes, I decided to upload this half-rendered version. Which one of my works have you liked the most? Please post your answer in the comments section, I am curiously awaiting your replies!!

 That is all for now, thank you so much for reading this far! Oh, and tomorrow is my birthday but I am not sure what to feel. To feel sad because I have gotten so old despite having achieved nothing or to be glad that I will receive some lovely messages tomorrow (hopefully). I am very conflicted if I may say so. Nevertheless, happy birthday to me thehehe! Wishing you a grand evening from Turkey and many Beltaine blessings!

 (This was the blog header I did for spring. However, I noticed that the resolution is too low just too late and hence had to create a new one very quickly. I do not wish for it to go to waste, hence posting it here.)